Moose in the Closet



More from Mighty Flirt


I am a big fan of skirts. Specifically, I am a big fan of Mighty Flirt skirts. This tulip skirt is an immediate winner. Just enough design to make it unique and interesting but not so much that you're afraid to wear it with any kind of jewelry, lest you resemble a gypsy on the way to the fair. Pair with a white top and your favorite platform sandals and off you go.



This petal mini is another score. Two inch band of tummy not required.

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MIghty Flirt


Look! Gorgeous dresses! I'm so thrilled about my discovery (if you can term anything widely available online a "discovery"), I'm drawing on my stash of seldom-used exclamation points. I was sifting through my bookmarks last night and happened on Mighty Flirt. How could I have forgotten about this place?

I'm totally losing my cool over this turquoise mod shift. I love it. I want to buy it and put it on my shift starved body. Right now.



Just look at this stunning white asymetrical dress. The lines and structure are gorgeous and I love the hem and slit sleeves.



You will be seeing more where these came from.

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Faking It


I like to be genuine whenever possible. Mainly because I'm a wretched actress. Tori Spelling looks like Meryl Streep next to the thespian efforts of yours truly. I would prefer not to fake fashion, especially as there would be no faking involved. If someone admires an outfit, I jump straight in to brag about the deal I got. Classy. So I won't fool anyone with my Target duds. But until I can beg, borrow or steal the real thing, fake it I will.

Here's my fake-it pick of the day:

Queen of the wrap dress, Diane von Furstenberg makes some beauties. This one goes for $365.



I checked the couch for spare change. I fell about 335 clams short. Luckily, it was just enough for this Isaac Mizrahi steal from Target. Excluding tax. I raided my car floor for that.


True fashionistas will not be fooled. But they'll admire your pluck in flaunting the Target designer wear. Everyone else, the rest of the world who could care less, will think you look great.

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Sweater Dresses for Fall


Or summer, if you happen to enjoy sleeping on a bed of rusty knife tips before an invigorating swim in lemon juice. No judgment here. If you don't choose procrastination in favor of donning hot, hairy outfits in 100 degree weather, here are my picks. No word on the effectiveness of air conditioning in the dressing rooms.

Note: sweater dresses are a definite trend but either my eye for a bargain has failed me or the cheaper outlets like Target and Forever 21 haven't yet caught on. All I found were high end versions. But if you find one you love and plan to wear it out this fall and winter, it may be worth a higher price.

This is a lovely red cashmere sweater dress from Bergdorf Goodman - the cowl neck and gorgeous color set it apart. It would be my pick, were I flush enough in the pockets for a $500 sweater. Which I'm not, so moving on...



I also love this cable knit from Ya Ya, made of alpaca wool with a nice scoop neck. In the $400 range. Which means we're getting closer to something one of us may actually buy...



This is a more reasonably priced (at least in comparison) dress from Anthropologie. The shape is nice, but might be a bit tricky off the hanger. Curvy women would probably do well in it. Try it on and let me know.



Poncho style in soft charcoal, this dress makes me want to curl up next to the fire with a book and a warm cookie.

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High-End Muppet Shoe


Oh, the comedy. This is the shoe of choice for the "Animal Discovers Drag" episode.

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I'll Have What She's Having


I've been known to buy things just because I like the way they feel. Then I pet myself in public. This is only one small step above petting other people in public. A friend introduced me to Cordarounds - and by "introduced me" I mean "she bought out the entire web site and now taunts me with her plush corduroy pants." I've been longing for this corduroy skirt ever since:

Horizontal corduroy, they're guaranteed not to make your butt look big. (If anyone's concerned about that horizontal thing.) The skirts are A-line with a cut-out to show off the lining, and come in both olive and brown. The day they make red is the day I buy three. Plus, it's a San Francisco company and Al Gore is all about buying local. I always listen to Al Gore when making my fashion choices.

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The Moose Has Moved


If any of you read my less fashionably clad alter ego, Moose in the Kitchen, you should update your bookmarks. Because I have escaped the greedy clutches of blogspot and am now on my own domain. With a fabulous design that, quite frankly, would be more appropriate for this rabidly shoecentric blog. I like to be difficult.

Lest you think this post wasted, here are some shoes.

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Obsession, thy name is Moose. I decide I like something and head straight to full immersion. Christian Louboutin is the new god of my shoe idolatry. This orange peep-toe heel would go really well with this or this or, um, this...you get the much belabored point.

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Large Hooved Women Rejoice


Barefoot Tess is devoted to making sure your size 10s are fashionably shod. Sizes up to 13 ensure that no woman, aside from the occasional spear-wielding Amazonian, is left without nice footwear. Cruising the selection of ballet flats is unusually rewarding. Especially if you like polka dots:

(I just realized that this shoe only seems to be available in size 7. I feel cheated.)

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They're Baaack...


As soon as you purge something from your closet thinking, "This will never come back" - it comes back. Just to mock you. Case in point: jean skirts. Call me short sighted but I never thought I'd see these again. Yet here they are. What's more, I even like some of them. Updated with an A-line shape (oh, how my thighs loves that!) and a hem that demurely hits the knee, rather than flaunting your superwoman underoos every time you drop something, this Marc Jacobs jean skirt is one that I would happily wear:


Practical and attractive, this baby would pair with virtually any top, pair of shoes or handbag in your closet.

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Spreading the Gospel


We now break from our previously scheduled program of irresponsible internet shopping to bring you a beauty tip. I never proffer beauty tips as I am neither qualified nor interested in anything but shoes. This is the exception.

I've spent a lot of money in my day attempting to keep my face, if not porcelain smooth, at least incapable of frightening small children. Imagine my delight when I realized that all that money was wasted. Yes, wasted. Because, apparently, all you need for a fresh-faced glow is a bottle of castor oil, a bottle of olive oil, and a wash cloth. All of which are far cheaper than your average Sephora trip.

Rubbing oil into your pores may seem counterintuitive. Or downright retarded. But my skin hasn't broken out once since I started this regime o' skincare and I've saved somewhere in the range of 50 bucks in pricey moisturizer.

Here's how it works: Rub generous amounts of castor oil into the blemish prone sections of your face. Rub generous amounts of olive oil everywhere else. Rinse a washcloth in hot water, squeeze it out and lay it on your face to let the warmth open your pours and allow the oil to penetrate. Repeat once or twice. Remove the oil with the wash cloth and splash your face with cold water. (Keep the wash cloths on a steady washing machine rotation to avoid rubbing yesterday's dirt into your pores.) Voila. No soap, no moisturizer - just oil. It's a remarkably good deep cleanser and gratifyingly cheap. I do use sunscreen in the morning and eye makeup remover when necessary, but nothing else.

At this rate, I'll be able to afford these in about two months.

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Know Thyself


"You will always be in fashion when you are true to yourself." ~ Maya Angelou

True to yourself and your need for fabulous shoes, that is.


I'm a big fan of simple design and "look at me, I'm awesome" color. Hence, I love these red wedges. The thin strap and tiny buckle make them even better than the rich crimson could manage on its own. Versatile enough for capris and a t-shirt, or a black pencil skirt, or that white halter dress you haven't worn yet, these shoes get the Moose stamp of approval.

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Three Times a Week, Every Week


I found these skirts via the meandering path of the interweb. Susie Sunshine proclaimed her love for Libby Dibby's reversible wrap skirts and I was sold. Note: reversible wrap = two skirts in one, you dirty cheater. I am proud to say that I am a dirty cheater.


I am also lazy, another bad habit this skirt encourages. It takes about as much effort to put on as wrapping a towel around your waist. With the added advantage of not caring one damn bit if you go up or down a size. Too much fried mayonnaise? Just loosen that ribbon and have another potato chip! If you do go down a size, please don't tell me. I eat fried mayonnaise.

Lady Libby uses an A-line design with vintage fabrics, which delights my little vintage-loving self no end. After much hemming, hawing, and frantic up-and-down scrolling, I have determined that spring champagne is my favorite:


Libby Dibby graciously extended her 10 percent discount to you, my six Moose in the Closet readers. Simply use the "unpaid" code word to receive your deal. If you decide to get one, tell Lady Libby that you found it here. I just might get an extra five percent off that spring champagne skirt I will be buying when that paycheck comes in. I'm all about exploiting my fine readers. While wearing a cute skirt.

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Wrapped in Plaid


This weekend found me eating fried mayonnaise and buying shoes in New York. The pleasure of finally wearing a pair of Campers outside the store was barely diluted by the fact that I couldn't get into the Christian Louboutin boutique on Madison. I think the rabid gleam in my eye convinced the sales women that my gun was larger than my disposable income. I can't say that instinct was entirely off base.

I tried to avoid too much shopping, given that my companion has a distressing lack of interest in shoes. But the miles and miles of window displays alone were worth any blisters. This red plaid dress from Intermix caught my eye at least three times as I wandered the city. My stellar taste has been confirmed by Budget Fashionista, who also featured this dress today.


It's Diane von Furstenberg for a pricey $500, which means it won't be gracing my closet any time soon. But the cut is gorgeous, the plaid is silk and the skirt is full. (This is especially pertinent if you, like me, indulge in fried mayonnaise.) Flattering for those who like plaid. Or those who don't like plaid, but are slaves to the trend machine that declares plaid is in.


Shop Bop Does Shoes Right


I posted similar wedges (in orange) awhile ago. These may be the exact same shoes. I'm too lazy to check. But these, my friends, are on sale for $100. Which may still be a lot for green shoes. But why quibble over insignificant details like color and price, when they are so fresh and simple? No strange ankle straps that perplex even the most devoted fashion queen, no metallics that will be dated three weeks ago. Clean. Perfect with jeans or a floaty skirt.


Same goes for these practical yet smashing flats. The stitch detail is lovely and the warm color will carry you straight into fall. If I could just lay my hands on someone else's credit card, shop bop would be ringing these up for me right now.




Extra Fabric Anyone?


It took me awhile to get used to the loose stomach trend. Also known as the "I'm not pregnant but rather look it, thanks" trend. But it's growing on me. If you hadn't noticed, I'm not a trend setter. I'm a sit back and wait until I get used to trends, by which time they're no longer trends. This doesn't concern me overly. I'm not exactly the type to buy a new wardrobe every year, so my clothes are two years out of date anyway. The upside to this is that you can wait for the sales.

Shop bop has a particularly fetching v-neck loose stomach shirt on sale for $47.


Easy outfit when paired with jeans and your favorite necklace. And we're all about the easy.


Paging Betty


Coif your hair, don the stockings and start vacuuming. This black and white checked silk dress is the epitome of '50s housewife. A look that I like to rock to some derision. Sure, it's a wee bit galling to mix a martini to hand your bacon-bringing husband at the door while mourning your swinging coed lifestyle. But at least you have a great dress.


For those of us who don't inhabit the set of Bewitched, this is just the dress to set you apart from the Juicy Couture set. A full skirt in a roomful of jeans will, depending on your chutzpah, make you feel overdressed - or kick ass femme fatale.

Slap on the red lipstick and channel Betty Page. No jeans can beat this skirt.


Bags for the Discerning Budget


Why pay attention to world affairs or even the latest antics of Britney Spears when you can devote your attention to more important things? Like purses. I've searched from high end (Chloe for $900 on sale) and low end (Old Navy beach bags for $15). My conclusion: as lovely as some of those Miu Miu and Chloe bags are, why pay almost $1,000 for a purse that will look like every other purse being carried by San Francisco socialites and P.R. girls in Manhattan? Especially when you can't afford it.

Instead, I've been combing antique stores for vintage hand bags and independent designers for the unique and quirky. Half Moon Bay (about half an hour down the coast from San Francisco) has been a gold mine of vintage credit card carriers. I found a black beaded pocket book for $30 and a small white beaded purse from the 1920's for $35 - both of which are just as lovely as anything at Neiman Marcus for $800. Since that doesn't help you at all, I've searched out a few purses available online that will distinguish you, and your piles of crap (we've all got piles of crap in our purses, don't deny it) from every other purse-carrying woman out there. Or purse-carrying man. Whichever way you like to swing.

The feathers may preclude this bag from everyday use, but it's perfect for swooping out for a drink. On sale for $50, it will probably be cheaper than your bar tab.


Sleek and classic, these bags can move from the office to that same bar. They're made of Italian leather (because Italian leather is clearly superior) with a satin pillow front. After my high-end designer research, $89 for a bag suddenly sounds far less painful.


Here is a personal favorite, which I've mentioned before and will likely mention again. Crafty Bitch makes gorgeous bags, in the $40 range. I own and love this suede felt clutch:


Petting it will make you happy.


Oink


The lingerie drawer is overflowing, but my lazy tendency is to head straight for the machine washable cotton. So I was thrilled to see Knickers Blog post about a store in Seattle that offers you the chance to decorate your derriere with piggy posteriors.


Perfect for a day of truffle hunting.


Alter Ego

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